Okay! Maybe there are two or three individuals still living that could eat these burgers — probably those fueled entirely by questionably placed pride and hubris — but not most. These are truly ridiculous burgers, the likes of which may actually cause you to seriously question the decision-making abilities of your fellow human beings.
The Double Bacon Hamburger Fatty Melt from Serious Eats
Meet the Double Bacon Hamburger Fatty Melt, from Serious Eats. Basically, it's two bacon cheeseburgers that utilize three bacon-stuffed grilled cheese sandwiches as buns. And if you can believe it, it's not actually the most extreme burger on this list. In fact, it's actually kind of quaint.
The "Fifth Third Burger"
The "Fifth Third Burger" available at the Fifth Third Ballpark in Michigan is a five pound cheeseburger consisting of 5 1/3rd pound burger patties topped with a full plate of nachos (complete with nacho cheese sauce, chili, shredded lettuce, diced tomato, salsa, sour cream, and tortilla chips), all stuffed inside an eight-inch bun.
The Bread-cheese Bacon Double Cheeseburger from Dude Foods
What you're looking at here are grilled cheese sandwiches (that use actual grilled cheese instead of bread), that also acts as the "bun" for double bacon cheeseburgers. Are you doing okay right now?
The Krispy Kreme Double Down Burger (via TopCultured)
Now, we bring you the Krispy Kreme Donut Double Down Burger, which is a KFC fried chicken and cheese "sandwich" (with fried chicken instead of bread of course), sandwiched between two sugary sweet glazed donuts.
Macaroni and Cheeseburger, photo by Jackie Alpers
This one had to be seen in the fullness of its glory. It is a tower of grilled Kraft's macaroni and cheese topped with two 1/3rd pound burger patties with a few dainty bits of shredded lettuce and sliced tomatoes on top. Gotta have those greens, after all.